Part 3: Adventure & Atrocity

6 Minute Listen or Read

Not too long after I had given my heart to Christ, I felt a gentle tug on my heart—a call to minister to the needs of others. What started out as praying for and listening to others turned into a calling to serve others in a greater capacity!

From talking with various people, I heard of a Bible College in a faraway city. So, after praying about it, I packed up and headed off to learn all I could about the Bible and becoming a minister.

Unfortunately, I only lasted seven (7) months in this Bible College. Why, you ask? Simple. My girlfriend was Caucasian, and as a man of color, our dating was a no-no!

Over time, the Bible College staff put so much pressure on the girl and her family that she finally caved in. She met with me and told me it wasn't God's will for us to be together!


Here's an interesting thing that happened in all of this:

  1. A few weeks before my girlfriend told me it was over, I had a dream about her. I dreamt that she was exiting her dormitory and walking toward the church building. And—she was pregnant! Of course, both of us were virgins, and I knew it wasn't my child. So, something was up.
  2. Fast-forward a few weeks and she tells me our relationship is over.
  3. Fast-forward several months and an old friend from the Bible College came to visit me at the cockroach-infested, almost condemned, building where I was living. He told me my ex-girlfriend had been spending a lot of time with another guy long before she and I had broken up. He felt compelled to share this with me—as well as some other “fascinating” info.
  4. Fast-forward a few years and the ex-girlfriend had married this same guy.
  5. Fast-forward a couple more years and she was pregnant with their first child.

Strange? Prophetic? Coincidence? I don't know. I just know that I had that dream shortly before I got kicked to the curb by the woman I loved.

Moving on… Shortly after my girlfriend had had the talk with me about breaking up, I got called into the vice president's office. He told me I was unwelcome at their Bible College and that I needed to vacate the premises by 5pm. So, I packed up all of my gear and left—with a HUGE hole in my heart and a chip on my shoulder.

A few days later, I was laid off from one of my jobs. A couple of days after that, I was laid off from my second job. As a result, I headed back to my hometown to talk with my parents about what had happened. Unfortunately for me, both parents ended up kicking me out and disowning me—with a warning and some really harsh words!

I tried hard to get a job in my hometown, but the city was in a recession. So, I ended up selling my car and taking a Greyhound bus to a city where I knew I could get a job.

With very little money in my pocket and not knowing how long it would take me to get a job, I ended up living on the streets of Saint Paul for two weeks. Finally, I got a job and found a room for rent—for $50 a month—in what turned out to be a cockroach-infested brothel.

For the next few weeks, I wrote nineteen (19) letters to family and friends in my hometown to ask for help. All of them went unanswered. Later, I found out my parents had told many people not to help me.

Let me tell you where this adventurous and atrocious chapter ended:

As a result of all I had experienced since my new birth experience, I was now in a really bad place—mentally and emotionally! I was angry, bitter, resentful, and even hostile. I was also in the beginning stages of developing an unforgiving spirit/attitude—something I would carry with me for a couple of decades (because I was stubborn). Long story short, I left church and had very little contact with Christians.

What did I learn from all of this?

Here are a handful of things I learned:

  1. I learned a lot about “Christians.” Here are two things I wish someone would have taught me when I first began:

    • All Christians, myself included, are flawed human beings—even after coming to Christ!
    • All Christians struggle with sin (i.e., violations of God's laws)—even after coming to Christ!

  2. I learned a lot about “Church Culture.” (NOTE: Each denomination has its own culture—i.e., their own way of doing things.) I discovered I LIKED certain cultures and DISLIKED others. Now, the cultures I disliked weren't necessarily bad or wrong. They just weren't to my liking—because they didn't inspire or encourage me to draw closer to Christ or to do the work of His Kingdom. THIS is also something I really wish someone would have taught me from the beginning—because I wouldn't have made some of the most common mistakes I see other Christians make (i.e., the Catholic way is the only way, or the Lutheran way is the only way, or the Pentecostal way is the only way, etc…). (More on this in another article!)
  3. I learned a lot about my own strengths and weaknesses. Here was one strength: I got hustle! (NOTE: In all my anger, I got one full-time job. A couple of weeks later, I got a second full-time job. And then after adjusting to the new routine, I got a part-time job and was now working 100 hours per week.) Here was one weakness: I was naive, unpolished, misinformed, crude and self-centered!
  4. Eventually, when I made my way back to Christ, I discovered my gifting and calling. Here's a hint: Because of all I had experienced, I discovered my Lord wanted me to work with (and minister to) people who've been hurt or harmed by people who called themselves "Christian"—and who were angry, bitter, resentful, hostile, and unforgiving. (More on this in a subsequent article!)

In the next section, I'll share with you some of the personal experiences the Lord used to draw me back to Him.

If you have questions or comments, email me here.

In His Name,

Roy